In the Moonlight
by Phoenix Stone
Summary: T/W What happens after the end of S4 E19 "New Moon Rising."


Note: Trying to get back into writing daily so I'm practicing with a bit of Buffy fanfiction. This is a standard, between-the-scenes type of fic, taking place after credits roll at the end of "New Moon Rising." Some lines were taken directly from the episode, so this is me not claiming to have invented them. What follows is smut, but hopefully also keeps in line with the atmosphere of the show. Serious critiques are appreciated, but give me something to work on. I am actually trying to learn and college is expensive so, if you're gonna flame, be my guest, but be specific or go home. All characters and their universe belong to Joss Whedon, the supreme leader of all good television.

* * *

Tara sat looking out her window, waiting. This had been one of the strangest days, and not in an "oh this is interesting" sort of way. She was in love and she was in love alone. The lights were out and it didn't really bother her. As a witch she had always enjoyed the moonlight. It comforted her, offered a quiet serenity, a hope that wasn't loud or intense and pushy the way sunlit hope was. It just said, "hey, there's hope over here if you're interested. If not, it's cool, we're available for gloom and depression as well. Your choice."

She couldn't see what was going on in the parking lot, her window was around the other side of the building, thankfully, overlooking a little lawn with a couple of sentinel trees. Crows and ravens loved sentinel trees, she knew, and she didn't know if that made her feel better or worse. Tricksters were like that, though, she supposed. They either put the sun in the sky so you can see and be warm or they pluck out your eyes and laugh and you just never could tell which kind of day it was going to be with them.

Whatever Willow decided, if she came by tonight and said goodbye and cried, or if she never came up to her room again and just avoided her the next few days, Tara knew she would accept it. She didn't want Willow ever to know just how sad and scared she'd been these last couple of days. She didn't want Willow to feel badly about following her heart. The heart and the soul just know things. Her mother had taught her that. They just know things and it's no use arguing. Tara didn't argue. She did feel like maybe her heart and soul were being controlled by a trickster now, though, and she thought it was kind of mean.

But she'd been through worse, she thought. It was getting late. At least the moon was still shining. She thought maybe she'd just go to sleep here where the cool blue light could touch her all night. But not yet. She wasn't that tired yet.

When the knock came, it surprised her, and Tara made the effort to quell any leaping for joy her heart wanted to do, recognizing Willow's knock.

She opened the door.

She was standing there, smiling a little, which Tara couldn't tell if it was excitement or nervousness.

"No candles?" Willow was saying. The way the flame danced in her eyes and warmed the color of her hair in the blue room made Tara have to swallow. Crying wouldn't do. She'd gone this long.

"Well, I brought one. It's extra flamey." Willow was nervous, doing a partial whisper, trying to keep her voice cheery. Tara had no idea what that meant. Willow stepped forward, and Tara stepped back, taking the proffered candle and giving her room to come into her dorm and shut the door. The warmth of the candle began seeping into her hands. She hadn't realized how cold she'd gotten, and she clutched the candle, thinking this was the last thing Willow was going to leave her with.

"Tara, I want to explain," Willow started, but Tara had practiced this part, and she didn't think she could stand to hear the words in real life.

"No, I understand. You have to be with the person you love," she whispered, the flame guttering and waving about angrily at her words. When Willow smiled, she thought, good, she'd saved her the hard part.

But then, she said,

"I am."

And Tara's heart started pounding. "You mean -"

"I mean." Willow was nervous again, but mostly happy. "Ok?" She was asking permission. She was asking if Tara wanted her, if she could forgive her. She was asking so many things, but the answer to all of them was,

"Oh, yes."

"I feel horrible about everything I put you through," she said, taking a step forward. The nervousness was gone. "And I want to make it up to you, starting right now."

Willow's eyes were glittering in the candlelight and her hair glowed copper and all Tara could say was, "Right now?" and try to catch her breath.

She smiled again. "Right now."

Tara blew out the candle.

Momentarily blinded in the recent darkness, Tara felt Willow step forward again and take the candle from her hand. She set it down on a nearby table and slid her hands around Tara's middle, brushing the skin that peeked out from under her shirt. Tara suppressed a shiver as she gathered Willow into her arms and pressed her lips to hers. Ever since those first tentative touches, a few weeks ago, this was all Tara had thought about. She threaded her fingers through Willow's hair, caressed her jaw and kissed her with all the relief and the love and the passion she had in her. She felt Willow's chest gutter out in an overwhelming of emotions and Tara suppressed a sob as she kissed her, flicking her tongue out just a little to taste her lips. Willow stepped forward again, pressing her body into Tara's even further. She was small, and firm, and shivering. Tara broke the kiss and stepped back just a little to look into her eyes.

"Are you ok?" She half-whispered, her voice lower than she thought it would be.

Willow looked into her eyes. "Definitely okay." She breathed, and bit her bottom lip.

"We can go slow if you want, I don't want to overwhelm -"

In response, Willow stepped back and lifted off her shirt, quickly regaining her former position, she put a soft hand on Tara's neck and pulled her in for another kiss. Tara let her kiss her, savoring it, as she slowly, lightly, ran her fingertips down Willow's back, unsure how far she would be allowed to go, what she would be allowed to touch when Willow suddenly pulled away.

"Hey," she said, frowning a little.

"What?" Tara said, "Do you want to stop?"

"No! It's just, a little unfair, don't you think?" and then she let a sly smile slowly slide across her lips. But then she corrected herself, "I mean - If you don't want to that's fine, but I wanted you to be able to touch me.." she trailed off, nervous.

"Oh." Tara said quietly. "Yes I suppose…" she bit her lip. She couldn't concentrate, she was staring at Willow's swan like neck and pink bra, at the spattering of freckles on her shoulders that became faintly noticeable in the moonlit room. She snapped back to reality when she saw the look on Willow's face. "That it is rather unfair, that is," when the relieved smile brightened Willow's eyes once more, she added, "I wonder if you would just help me a little."

Willow smiled again and blushed. "I have been known to be very helpful, as a person," she said, playfully, but then she didn't move. She let go of Tara and picked her fingernails awkwardly, trying not to stare at Tara's chest, not knowing where else to look.

Tara cupped Willow's hands in hers and brought them to her lips, locking eyes with her over her knuckles. "Do you want to stop?"

Willow's eyes darkened, her cheeks flushed just a little pinker, and she shook her head. "No." She breathed, and swallowed. "No I do not want that at all, it's just, I'm just not sure I - quite know how to…"

Tara kissed her fingers again. "Yes, you do." She took Willow's hands and she put them at each shoulder, hooking Willow's thumbs around the sweatshirt, and then she let go of her hands to reach forward to pull Willow's hips closer to hers, capturing her lips as Willow pushed the sweatshirt off Tara's shoulders. She let go of Willow again to pull her arms free and smiled against her lips as she heard it fall to the floor. She broke the kiss to capture Willow's hands again and place them at the hem of her shirt, but she didn't let go yet. She held them and waited for Willow's eyes to find hers.

"This," she breathed, and she made Willow's fingertips brush the skin of her stomach just under the hem of her shirt. She paused and bit her lip. "This is the part where it gets very hard for me to stop," she had to stop and breathe again as Willow shook loose from her grasp and greedily slid her hands around her skin to rest on her hips, "But, darling, I will stop, I want you to know, if you say so, no matter when. I want you so badly but there is lots of time for this…"

"Tara," Willow said softly, "Stop." Tara began to back away but Willow dug her fingers into her back and wouldn't let her go anywhere. "Stop holding back. I trust you."

Tara took her at her word. She pulled her in for another kiss, this time letting her breath heave the way it wanted, letting the small whimpers escape from her throat as Willow's hands traveled up her torso and her fingertips found the bottom of her breasts. Willow gasped as she realized Tara was braless and only hesitated a moment before letting her hands continue upward, sliding her fingers and then her palms over her nipples. Tara's knees tried to drop her as Willow groaned when she felt Tara's nipples pebble against her palms.

"Maybe we should sit," Willow offered, and Tara nodded vigorously as she steered them to the bed.

Once seated, Willow took the bottom of Tara's shirt in her hands and lifted it over her head and tossed it on the floor. She let her eyes drink in the sight of Tara's breasts and skin in the moonlight for just a second before Tara captured her lips again.

"I can't stop kissing you," Tara breathed against her lips.

"Then don't," Willow answered.

Tara had to let go for a second to pull her hair out of their faces and Willow's heart skipped. "My god, Tara," She whispered, "You're so beautiful," and tears sprang to her eyes.

"Shhh," Tara said, kissing her again, but more softly this time.

The day's emotions were still right on the surface, and Tara's ability to follow her needs from confidence to passion to comfort made Willow's heart feel like it could burst. A tear escaped and Tara pulled away when she tasted it. She smiled quietly into Willow's eyes and wiped the tear away with her thumb. "Come on," She said, and slid them back onto the bed, Willow on her back and Tara propped up on her side right beside her. She cradled Willow's head on her arm and leaned down to kiss her so softly it made Willow want to cry even more. When she pulled away again, she didn't say anything. She just stared at the woman beside her and smiled.

"You are like the candlelight, you know." Tara said, letting her free hand roam wherever it was curious that wasn't covered by clothing. It fluttered from Willow's hair to her lips to her stomach and neck and back in a non-pattern of attention.

"You mean I'm flickery and leave behind unsightly soot?"

"No." Tara didn't want to joke right now. "No, you're fire, Willow. That's what drew me to you in the first place. You are capable of such amazing power, but mostly, you just like to warm things and cheer things up, and that's incredible. You are like hope, you see? Like flames on a birthday cake or a torch in the darkness. You're more beautiful than anyone knows. But I see you. I see you, Willow. No one is ever going to - I don't think I'll ever - Willow? Are you crying?"

"No." Willow sniffled a little. "Maybe. I'm not really the type that gets called beautiful very much. Or ever. I get cute and pretty sometimes but beautiful?" She shook her head. "Sounds so grown-up."

Tara kissed her deeply again, slowly but strongly reigniting the flame from earlier. "You are beautiful," she whispered against her lips, and when she pulled back, Willow followed, re-capturing Tara's lips and lifting her upper body off the bed just a little. She pivoted her hips and slid an arm around Tara's waist and pulled their bodies together.

"Please don't stop," Willow whispered and fell back onto her back, this time pulling Tara on top of her.

Tara's heavy breasts fell down and caressed the fabric of Willow's bra, and the sensation brought up feelings Willow hadn't been prepared for. She'd been chest to chest with boys before but this, she decided, was so much better. She let her hands test the curve of Tara's ribcage and waist and hips as Tara continued kissing her, letting her tongue invade her mouth. After a while Willow got brave and she let one of her hands caress Tara's breast. Tara broke the kiss, gasping, and suddenly sat up. Willow followed, worried she had overstepped, but almost immediately her fears were quelled because instead of putting distance between them, Tara began pulling at Willow's bra straps. And when Willow reached back to unclasp the hooks and let the bra slide from her arms to the floor, Tara pressed their bodies so firmly together Willow could tell exactly how hard Tara's nipples were. Tara quickly regained her previous position on top of Willow and ran her hand hungrily over her small breasts. Willow's back arched involuntarily into the touch, and Tara swung a leg over so that it was positioned between Willow's and she slowly let her weight fall onto it, pressing it more and more firmly into Willow's center as she began teasing her nipples and eliciting more arching and a few whimpers from her body.

"Willow," Tara said, panting. "I want to take our pants off. Is that okay?"

"Yes. Yes. Pants bad." Willow whispered back, arching into the pressure between her legs. She let out an involuntary whimper as she felt Tara's body leave her as Tara stood up to discard her own pants, and then her heart began beating even harder as Tara frantically pulled at Willow's button and zipper, pulling her jeans down over her hips and throwing them onto the floor.

"My goddess," She heard Tara whisper almost to herself and she picked her head up to look at her standing at the foot of the bed.

"What?" Willow asked.

Tara was biting her lip. She looked up at Willow's face and said, "What? Oh, nothing. I can just see…" she trailed off, suddenly unsure how this would sound to Willow.

"See what?" Willow pushed, getting more and more nervous under that intense stare. No one had ever stared at her body like that.

Tara took a deep breath and ran her hands up Willow's calves. "The moonlight is very bright and I can see how wet you are."

Willow blushed furiously. "Oh. Is - is that bad?"

Tara shook her head as she climbed back on top of Willow. She seized one of Willow's wrists and brought it down to her own panties. She let Willow feel the warm wetness seeping through the cotton and she said, huskily, "No it's really not."

Willow's breath was heaving again. "Tara, I want…"

"Yes, darling?"

"I want to touch you. I want to feel, I want…." She trailed off, no longer capable of coherent sentences.

"Then touch," Tara said, as she expertly rolled to the side and pulled Willow on top. "I'm yours."

.


End file.
